Police Blotter

Tues­day, Nov. 22:
5 a.m. Hil­da Deck­er, of West Brad­ford Lane, report­ed that there were four too many cows in her milk string this morn­ing.
6 a.m. Ed Plum, of N Plains Road, report­ed that his two-seater out­house had gone miss­ing in the night. It had been there at 9:14 p.m., Plum report­ed, but was miss­ing at 5:50 a.m.
7:20 a.m. Hil­da Deck­er, of West Brad­ford Lane, report­ed that there were six too many cows in the loaf­ing shed when she poured the chopped silage. She can­not sep­a­rate them out her­self since her hip got bad and will have to wait for her son to come home for lunch to sep­a­rate the cows.
8 a.m. John Miller, of N Wilbur­man Road, report­ed that his farm truck was miss­ing, he had left the keys in it, as usu­al, and parked it behind the hay barn ready for ear­ly morn­ing feed­ing.
9 a.m. Susan John­son, of 997 Ore­gon Way, report­ed that her hus­band, Troy, was claim­ing his garage had been bro­ken into but was unable to report what, if any­thing had been tak­en as the garage was, accord­ing to Susan John­son, “a packrat’s trea­sure chest.”
10 a.m. Prin­ci­pal Jones reports that two minors are tru­ant
10:15 a.m. Howard Fish­er, of N. Flats Road, reports that 7 of his cows have escaped and although he has dri­ven 12 miles in every direc­tion he can­not find them.
11:20 Susan John­son, of 977 Ore­gon Way, report­ed that her hus­band, Troy, was now sure a cream sep­a­ra­tor, a shov­el, a fence stretch­er and a leaf blow­er were miss­ing from his garage.
1: 20 p.m. Alon­zo Gon­za­les was arrest­ed after being stopped for dri­ving with expired tags and dis­cov­ered to be dri­ving on a sus­pend­ed license. His 1977 Toy­ota was impound­ed.
2 p.m. John Miller, of N. Wilbur­man Road, report­ed that his farm truck had been found inside the barn but insists that he did not park it there him­self. It was not pos­si­ble to ascer­tain if it had been dri­ven because the odomot­er broke when it turned over for the sec­ond time in 1987 Miller said. He had found a mys­te­ri­ous object in the back of the truck but could not iden­ti­fy it.
2:10 p.m. Prin­ci­pal Jones report­ed that the two minor tru­ants were found in the library where they claimed they had been all along. They claimed to have missed their morn­ing class­es because they were prepar­ing for a par­tic­u­lar­ly dif­fi­cult physics test last peri­od.
4 p.m. Susan John­son, of 977 Ore­gon Way, report­ed that her hus­band, Troy, felt sure three oth­er items were miss­ing from a peg-board on his garage wall but could not name the objects as he had not seen the peg board in near­ly five years.
6 p.m. Oram Hilld­sren, of 987 Ore­gon Way, called to com­plain that a huge pile of house­hold goods and old tools had been deposit­ed both on the side­walk and in the street and that he had near­ly wrecked his Sub­aru avoid­ing the mess.
6:12 p.m. Bri­an Deck­er, of West Brad­ford Lane, report­ed that his moth­er had now iden­ti­fied 10 cows too many but that Howard Fish­er had rid­den over with his two daugh­ters after school and dri­ven his 7 cows home and no one knew who the oth­er three belonged to. Deck­er said he wasn’t real­ly sure they were extras at all, but his moth­er was the dairy­woman and knew every cow by name and couldn’t come up with names for these three.
6:20 p.m. Oram Hilld­sren, of 987 Ore­gon Way, called to report that the miss­ing leaf blow­er was his and that Troy John­son is now also unable to account for an elec­tric hedge trim­mer and a 20-ft Cher­ry pick­er lad­der that Hilld­sren lent him in June.
7 p.m. Susan John­son, of 977 Ore­gon Way, called to report that she had placed orange pylons that her hus­band Troy had found in a large bar­rel in the back of the garage around the grow­ing pile of what she referred to as “the best Thanks­giv­ing week­end garage sale Ger­maine has ever seen.”
Wednes­day, Nov. 23
2:12 p.m. Police respond­ed to a report that a black 2005 Lexus LX had missed the blind curve on Blind Curve Blvd, tak­en out the sharp-curve-ahead sign and run into the ditch. David Gor­dan, Ger­main Vol­un­teer Fire-fight­er and EMT, rode out with police. The dri­ver of the car, Ban­don Wil­son of Bend, suf­fered an airbag-deploy­ment black eye in the acci­dent and a pos­si­ble bro­ken foot from kick­ing the stump of the sharp-curve-ahead sign. He claimed that the sharp-curve-AHEAD sign would indi­cate that the curve was com­ing, not that one was already at the apex of a 90 degree angle. He paid the $300 fine for destruc­tion of coun­ty prop­er­ty and was released to his rel­a­tives, the Wilson’s of Van Bib­ber Road. Jasper’s Garage pulled the car from the ditch. “It’s got the smile of a rodeo cow­boy, “Jasper Brad­ford said, “but it’s dri­vable in day­light so long as you don’t have far to go.”
Thurs­day, Nov. 24
11 a.m. Ger­maine Vol­un­teer Fire­fight­ers respond­ed to a report of a fire at the home of Dil­lon and Peg­gy Mas­ter­son, 122 Vil­lage Ave. Dil­lon claimed that a leg on the turkey deep-fry­er, which he bought on ebay for $30, had giv­en way, dump­ing five gal­lons of peanut oil onto the dri­ve, where it ignit­ed when it came into con­tact with the gas fire-ring he had placed under the tank of the fry­er. The fire had spread to the street when he had tried to put it out with a water hose and washed the burn­ing flame into the leaves at the curb. Dam­ages were esti­mat­ed at about $12.50 for the turkey and anoth­er $60 for the oil. The deep-fry­er was declared “worth­less” by Mas­ter­son and did not fig­ure into the dam­ages.
Fri­day, Nov. 25
No inci­dents report­ed.
Sat­ur­day, Nov. 26
8 p.m. Police respond­ed to a report of loud music in a farm field on East Brad­ford Lane but found only two hors­es run­ning up and down the field. The hors­es were very agi­tat­ed Sher­iff Sweet said and “there was no doubt some­thing had been going on in that field.”
9 p.m. Police respond­ed to a report of a fist-fight in the park­ing lot of the Hon­ey Do Tav­ern but the alter­ca­tion had end­ed and the par­ties had left the premis­es by the time they arrived. No dam­age was report­ed.
Sun­day, Nov. 27
6 a.m. Ed Plum, of N Plains Road, report­ed that his two-seater out­house had returned. It had not been there at 9:14 p.m. Sat­ur­day night but it was there where it ought to be at 5:50 a.m. It had been stocked with a new roll of paper. And had, accord­ing to Plum, “a strange smell.”

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